Why does the truth offend ?

Why do we get offended by the truth? Some people are offended by truth because of its very nature— it is exclusive and it is absolute, not relative. The absolute nature of truth means that it does not depend on, nor is it changed by, people's opinions. For example, if someone says, “There is no God,” that does not affect the existence of God.

What did God say about the truth? Christ Jesus said, "Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free" (John 8:32).

Why is being offended a sin? The Bible teaches not to bear grudges and ignore insults against us in Proverbs 12:16 and Leviticus 19:18. In this age of insults and offense we as Christians must remember it's a sin to allow other people to offend us and stop us from doing all of what God wants us to do or has called us to do.

Why are we so easily offended? Often people are easily offended due to a manifestation of their own insecurities. It could also be that people who are easily offended have an abnormal desire for control and typically suffer from anxiety.

Matthew 15:10-20 ~ Sometimes the Truth will be Offensive.

"Jesus offended the religious leaders and the text indicates that He meant to do it. He did it on purpose. He offended them because they were following their traditions and their commandments of traditions instead of the Scriptures themselves. The reason He offended them is given in verse 13, 'That which is not planted of My Father must be rooted up.' They are going down the wrong path and Jesus says, 'I put a hindrance there.' Put something there for them to stumble over while they are making their way down the wrong path. Gave them something to think about, something to challenge them with. And in that sense, the offense is purely acceptable; in fact, something the Lord does all the time."

Many Christians don’t know how to react or what to say to people who support the world’s sinful ways because they don’t want to be offensive. However, our concerns should not be about offending the sinners but about offending Christ who gave His life to rescue them! We don’t have much time left to get the salvation message out there, so let’s not be worried about what others may say or think of us; let’s be concerned about them spending eternity in hell because we didn’t tell them the truth. Yes, truth does offend sin, but it saves lives!

The weight of truth.

Hearing the truth can hurt. We admit it jestingly, but the old axiom has more meaning than most people want to know. When the truth hurts, one must choose either to endure pain or avoid truth—a distressing choice. The result? "The truth is heavy, therefore its bearers are few" (emphasis supplied).

Few want to see themselves as truth-avoiders, yet often people let themselves believe that truth is only relative. Those people who believe truth is only relative can only be "relatively truthful." Many would never steal, lie, or cheat, but being truthful is not merely saying or doing truth in a particular circumstance. Being truthful also involves what a person thinks and feels. Genuinely truthful people are planted in truth, standing on truth, growing in truth and truth is the fruit of their being. They have truth in their "inner parts" (Psalm 51:6). To remain truthful, they must continually measure not only their actions, but their attitudes against that standard.

When does truth hurt?

Truth confronts us with that which we do not want to know. For example: "It's true that someday we will die." Most people accept that on a superficial level, nevertheless they haven't really embraced the truth of that fact. Those who really believe it deep down have found their own mortality a painful truth to endure. Thoughts of the mortality of loved ones can be even more painful.

Truth also hurts when it requires us to stop doing what we want to do, or requires us to start doing what we don't want to do. It cuts through excuses and requires us either to do what is right…or sacrifice our view of ourselves as people who do what they know they should. Some avoid that choice by blurring the line between what is true and what isn't. Our world has become so full of blurry lines that many people don't realize that reality is not actually ambiguous by nature.

Truth is painful when it focuses on our own responsibilities and shortcomings instead of allowing us to focus on everyone else's. It emphasizes our own need to change and grow. In the midst of conflict, we like to believe that we are right, that we are innocent—and that our suffering is the result of someone else's insensitivity or guilt. But truth causes us to see ourselves as naked and as helpless as we are. All of us are sometimes wrong, sometimes guilty and sometimes we use our emotions, words, and even our actions to manipulate or hurt others. It is painful to see ourselves as we are—so much so that some people never do.

What is truth, if not the ground of reality? Is reality merely a reflection of our feelings and beliefs, or is it simply beyond our grasp? Many think it is one or the other; truth is a notion or it is unknowable. Others believe truth is concrete or tangible. Though people will readily agree to such notions when it comes to philosophy or theology, few see "tangible" reality as being so whispy and elusive.

The truth.

God expects us to be truthful (Exodus 20:16). This standard is repeated throughout the Scriptures, and it extends to all we do. Integrity should be a way of life, not a tagline.

As Christians, there are things we believe or say that society around us would find offensive and demand we retract. We cannot compromise and be "PC" when it interferes with reporting the truth or explaining God's Word. God instructs us to obey Him over other authorities without shame (Acts 5:29; Luke 9:26).

God does offer us instructions on how to speak the truth. In 1 Peter 3:15, He tells us to answer questions about our faith "with meekness and fear." We must share God's truth with humility, respect and love (Ephesians 4:15). If we speak with arrogance, condescension or contempt, we are failing to fulfill these instructions. By observing these scriptures, you can still have "a good conscience" when others find what you say offensive (1 Peter 3:16).

A call to greater responsibility.

God holds you and me very accountable for what we say. "But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned" (Matthew 12:36-37). God does not want us to be careless or thoughtless with our words. We are to be intentional, measured and edifying.

Why? God gives His Church several great responsibilities. Christians are to proclaim the gospel of the Kingdom to everyone (Mark 16:15). Speech is one important area where we can be an example to others (1 Timothy 4:12). Additionally, God's Church is to serve as a watchman to the world, alerting it when prophetic danger is on the horizon and to the peril of its own wrongdoing (Ezekiel 33:1-11). These missions must be conducted with compassion and accuracy. God calls us to be bold without being rash.

The Bible tells us others will be offended and divided by Christ's message (Matthew 10:34-36; 1 Corinthians 1:32). Should we then seek—that is, go out of our way—to further offend people by speaking coarsely or disrespectfully?

God commands us to avoid this. In 1 Corinthians 8:9, Paul teaches to avoid causing others to stumble. This means we should avoid placing them in compromising situations which would profane their conscience and offend them. Paul repeats this principle to the Corinthians throughout his correspondence with them (2 Corinthians 6:3, 1 Corinthians 10:31-33, see also Romans 14:13). Jesus Christ proclaimed "woe" on those through which offenses come (Luke 17:1-2).

Purposefully offending others does not further the gospel message or God's plan. The only purpose it serves is a selfish one. It may be us letting off steam, us trying to tempt, provoke, or "trigger" someone, us working to get a point across, or some other reason. But that reason is never to serve and respect them, or to love and honor God. God's instruction is to "live peaceably with all" as much as is in our power (Romans 12:18; Romans 14:19). Seeking to intentionally offend others fails to create peace. It is harmful and wrong.

In difficult situations.

Of course, we should never censor or neuter God's truth. Prayerfully ask God for the best way to share it, guiding you in wisdom and self-control. Aim to take a kind and courteous approach, one you would want others to take with you (Luke 6:31). God sees a difference between us sharing His truth and someone else getting offended, versus us deliberately saying something inflammatory in hopes riling them up (Proverbs 15:1-4).

It might surprise you to learn Jesus Himself offended others during His ministry. Let's look at what He said when His disciples were troubled by this. "Every plant which My heavenly Father has not planted will be uprooted. Let them alone. They are blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind leads the blind, both will fall into a ditch" (Matthew 15:12-14). There are three key points we can glean from this:

1. In the grand, vast scheme of God's plan, everything not from God will fade away. Remember, in the long run, God's truth always wins, and only His truth will be found in His Kingdom, where these individuals may have the opportunity to personally know God and walk His way.

2. There's no sense in explaining God's truth to others over and over again when you've already shared it (Matthew 7:6). In the disciples' time, this could have been a matter of life or death. Today, it can still lead to hurt feelings, physical altercations and a lifetime of bitterness. Let it be.

3. If they are acting or endorsing actions contrary to God's way, the negative consequences of their behavior will eventually come to fruition (Hosea 8:7; Galatians 6:7).

A matter of the heart.

"Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things, and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things" (Matthew 12:34-35).

The words you and I say reflect both who we are and who we are working to become. Think about this verse as it relates to being both extremely politically correct or extremely "raw" and unfiltered.

What do your words say about you? What do you want your words to say about you? Consider the mind and heart God desires us to have and works to develop within us. By His Spirit, God wants to tend and grow in us the fruits of love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Do our words evidence that growth?

God has a precious and vital standard for what we say, governing Christians both as individuals and as the Church entire. God is not calling us to be feeble and "PC," but He isn't calling us to bully or browbeat either. We need to be balanced, wisely choose which words to say, and never sacrifice the truth. While we are told to avoid it as much as possible, sometimes offending others may be required to properly share God's truth. God calls us to speak with compassion, humility and respect at all times. "Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one" (Colossians 4:6).

As this blog comes to a close, imagine a world-renowned painter beginning his work. He judiciously lays out his canvas before selecting and mixing his paints. There's an image in his head of exactly what he wants to tell his audience and how he wants to deliver that message. Meticulously, he begins to paint. And when he paints, as he's crafting his masterpiece, he never paints with a brush that's too big and broad or a brush that's too small to make its mark. He finds just the right brush.

So too should we speak, using just the right words. A word fitly spoken is an apple of gold (Proverbs 25:11).